I always get very anxious right before a big trip. Lately, (read: since graduating from NMSU with my master's and becoming a happy basement bum at my parent's house) I haven't had any stress in my life and I generally try to not be one to borrow trouble. But something about the few days prior to leaving on a major journey really winds me up.
The excitement of everything to come.
The concern that I'll forget something.
The fear that I'll make a huge mistake and ruin part or all of my trip.
The pressure of packing, moreso for this trip than any other.
I thought I'd lost my beloved Nalgene bottle and carrier the other day. Assumed I'd left it somewhere and it wasn't there! Made me abnormally anxious. I got that bottle and carrier from my friend Cabrina when we graduated together at WKU. She knows I'm not capable of drinking from a wide mouth one, so she got me the narrow mouth. I started texting different people asking if I had left it in various places. No luck.
Of course it was just in my car. In the back seat instead of the front.
How embarrassing (yet relieving)!
But even with all of that going on, I cannot properly express my excitement for this trip. I am often asked if I am scared. Fear is not what I'm feeling. I will learn so much about myself and the world. I will be careful and safe, yet open to so many possibilities. Usually people would tell their friends and family "I will miss you." But for some reason that phrase just doesn't sit well with me. It doesn't reflect the excitement and positivity involved and is really more sad than anything. Perhaps that sentiment is better suited for when someone or something is truly gone. I'll be so connected via the marvels of technology that I won't actually be removed from everyone's lives. And then I'll be back in a few short months. I've given some thought on a more adequate parting phrase. Right now I am really digging "I will be happy to see you". Just as short and sweet, but, to me, conveys more excitement.
Of course, when you aren't sure about how to say something with words, music will be glad to help. Been a while since one of my super hip 8tracks mixes, but here's one for those of us that will be happy to see each other again in the Fall.
How do you feel before a big event? Excite like Christmas Eve or nervous like meeting your girlfriend's angry dad?